despair disappear

(The Poetry Series #7)


i
step a thousand times
in one direction
and then
a thousand times
in another

wondering
where will i get
thinking
the destination will
be met
on the next step

she
wonders what i feel
within the throes
of my unknown journey
ever wanting
to succeed

she
holds my hand softly
knowing how i feel
but not really
knowing what i feel
because she cannot

sometimes
i want to tell her everything
and others nothing
but mostly
i tell her
what i can

God
must be close to me
we are friends
the two of us
at least i would like
to believe we are

someone
told me God doesn’t
care anymore
they said he could not
because so many
now suffer

but
i look to the joy
i find in the loving of self
in the loving of others
in the knowledge that
this will soon end

i
reflect upon my journey
and see its origins
knowing this man
is a far better man
then the man that began

and
i begin to elevate
my mindset to a better place
where i can remember
to smile in my contentment
even as i sigh

because
this is just a moment
in my life
and not its entirety
and while it is an unknown place
it is mine

i
once believed i was on top of all
unable to fail
unable to fall
unable to bend
and now
I have been bent

it
is interesting
this life i have been living
fraught with triumph
and heartache
with anger
with love

yet
in all this
i keep coming to one
simple
undeniable truth
i am alive

so
each day i begin
by thanking God
for another beautiful
moment of life
regardless of challenge

and
each night
I praise the day
because at the
very least
i have survived it

after
all we are part of
a whole that cannot
be broken by us
it can only be
acknowledged

there
is so much beauty
yet alive
for us to enjoy
if we
but look

if
we but believe
if we but hope
and
if we but accept
it becomes ours

so
i take this moment
of frustration
and i understand
it is but a small part
in the big plan

i
determine to find
my joy my faith
and i know my time
is near at hand
just wait

in
Gods time
i shall BE that
which i am to be
though in this moment
i do not see
that i already am

my
life is but a spec
of glamor in a
sea of light
it is of value to me
as are my desires

despair
is at my door
chomping at the bit
to ruin my temperament
to cause my failure
to give me pause

yet
i pray
it will soon disappear
i pray
this too shall pass
i pray in quiet faith

when
i send my prayers
into the mist
i will do so knowing
they will be
answered

when
i send my prayers
into the mist
i will do so knowing
they will be
answered.

when
i send my prayers
into the mist
i will do so knowing
they WILL be
answered!